Eurovision 2009 Superlatives

We have warm memories of the 2009 Eurovision Song Contest.  It’s a high water mark for the Contest, chock full of great songs and amazing performances (and also whatever the hell it was that Belgium and Czech Republic sent). Plus, it was also the first time we hosted a Eurovision party. We’ve been getting our friends hooked on it ever since.

We did a Superlatives post for the 2009 Semifinal, but for some reason we never followed up with one for the Final. Let’s rectify that now.

  • Best Alicia Keys impression: Lithuania (Sasha Son – “Love”)
  • Most genuine plea for peace, love, and understanding: Israel (Noa and Mira Awad – “There Must Be Another Way”)
  • “Move and let me show you how it’s done” award: France (Patricia Kaas – “Et s’il fallait le faire”)
  • Singer who is clearly the most happy to be there: Sweden (Malena Ernman – “La voix”)
  • Weirdly oiliest performance: Croatia (Igor Cukrov – “Lijepa Tena”)
  • Most joyful acid trip: Portugal (Flor-de-Lis – “Todas as ruas do amor”)
  • “And then there’s a dolphin” award for most random background image: Iceland (Yohanna – “Is It True?”)
  • Least necessary shirt: Greece (Sakis Rouvas – “This Is Our Night”)
  • Best Armenians with frickin’ laser beams: Armenia (Inga and Anush – “Jan Jan” )
  • Staging that best captures how we feel watching the performance (see, because it gets old fast): Russia (Anastasiya Prikhodko – “Mamo”)
  • Most eyerolls: Azerbaijan – seven (AySel – “Always”)
  • Best mash-up of American, Russian and French Revolution iconography: Bosnia and Herzegovina (Regina “Bistra voda”)
  • Least utilized guy with a staff: Moldova (Nelly Ciobanu – “Hora din Moldova”)
  • Most intergalactic: Malta (Chiara – “What If We”)
  • Most planetary: Estonia (Urban Symphony – “Rändajad”)
  • The Eric Saade Award for most palpable sense of relief at the end of the song: Denmark (Niels Brinck – “Believe Again”)
  • Best reason to completely reevaluate what you want from the Eurovision Song Contest: Germany (Alex Swings Oscar Sings! – “Miss Kiss Kiss Bang”)
  • Tina Karol Award for best Shakira impression: Turkey (Hadise – “Düm Tek Tek”)
  • Kejsi Tola Award for best Disco Gumby: Albania (Kejsi Tola – “Carry Me in Your Dreams”)
  • Most foregone conclusion: Norway (Alexander Rybak – “Fairytale”)
  • The Svetlana Loboda Award for least subtle sexual innuendo: Ukraine (Svetlana Loboda –  “Be My Valentine”)
  • The Other Svetlana Loboda Award for “more is more” staging: Ukraine
  • Best performance by wood nymphs on a hen do: Romania (Elena – “The Balkan Girls”)
  • Best audition for Sugababes: United Kingdom (Jade Ewen – “It’s My Time”)
  • Most schlagerrifc urban blight: Finland (Waldo’s People – “Lose Control”)
  • Best cover of the 2005 Macedonian entry: Spain (Soraya Arnelas – “La noche es para mí”)
  • Most likely to get there, popular: Norway

Originally published 30 September 2015